Did you ever notice how your ego sounds a bit like a pageant mum?
She means well, is working double time and using all her resources to try and get her little girl to win. She just wants her to work harder, be more successful and look better so she can be more accepted.
On the surface, you can’t fault her dedication. But the problem is all of her efforts are built on the foundation that her little girl is not enough and everything is always a competition.
“You’re not good enough” or “They’re not as good as you”
“You’re are loser” or “At least you’re better than her”
“You’re ugly” or “You are prettier than her”
That’s because the ego operates from a superiority and inferiority paradigm. It is always comparing and trying to improve or defend your place on the ladder, relative to others.
There is another way
If you want to work with your ego, it’s important to see how just like that pageant mum, your ego is completely undermining your self worth and any chances of being truly happy:
- Living in the past- like that 80s hairdo, your ego is stuck in the past, worrying about what happened last time and can never just be present in the moment. Try overcoming this by grounding yourself in your 5 senses.
- Taking it personal- Your ego thinks everything is about you. It makes everyone else’s choices, wins & struggles personal and acts like everything is one big competition. Try to make room for other people to just have their own experience without needing to insert yourself in it.
- It loves to start fights- The ego needs an enemy to defend itself against so it feels really justified in finding a situation or a person to be against. Remind yourself that we can just be for something because of our values and that we all get to win.
- Nitpicking- Just like the primping, preening & spray tans are all an attempt to overcome faults, the ego loves to magnify perceived flaws in yourself and others. Retrain your brain to find beauty in imperfections, to not need to categorise things as better or worse, just different.
If you are ready to get off the stupid ladder and stop competing against others for your worthiness and discover a world of being loved, known, enjoying satisfying relationships and endeavours that light your souls on fire… I can help.
There are 4 ways you can currently work with me. Get in touch via email to get started today.